RUMORS OF EDDIE MURPHY'S DEATH GREATLY EXAGERATED

    Reports of actor Eddie Murphy dying in a snowboarding accident have been reported as untrue. While it is unclear who hatched the hoax, incorrect death reports are not uncommon. Obituaries of famous people are often prepared in advance, and later get accidently published. Body misidentification, errors and  misunderstandings, name confusion and death of impersonators also result in erroneous death reports. Dick Chaney, George Bush and Kurt Colbain have all been misreported as dead in the past. Fidel Castro’s "death notice" incorrectly reported that he was a movie actor. Mr. Chaney was listed as "Queen Cosort" and George H.W. Bush was announced to be dead by CNN and his obituary appeared in Das Spiegel. Kurt Colbain was in a drug induced coma and thought to be dead. Photo art credited to Shaun Kwang. 

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➡A local roofer, Stan Kosharsky, says that Jeff is the best roof pressure cleaner he knows. "The man is not afraid of heights and he is one of the nicest human beings I've ever met. All of my customers who have used Jeff's services have cooed about what a sweet man he is." Stan says the company gives cleaning and washing estimates.   "Makes it easy for me when I bid roof leak repair jobs," Stan said.☂
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THE "BEST KEPT SECRET" IN DIGITAL MEDIA EDUCATION

Professor Eric Hulzizer, right, instructs in the SPC college studio in Seminole. Col. Clearwater explains the secret. - Photo by Tiki Parrot

Tippy Ebeling's Fender Monster No Longer Stalks Birds at the Library

The beast has rusted through and is stored  on a pallet  in the city warehouse. Mr. Ebeling was approached by city officials about repairing the deteriorated dinosaur, but the critter was beyond repair. Mr. Ebeling offered to create a new monster to grace the front of the main branch of the library, but the cost, $10,000 was too steep for today's lean budget.

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GREG TIN NEW SUN GUEST POET

Celebrates "One Of Those Days"

Awkward

A Poem by

GREG TIN

Used With Permission

Thick winter clothes

Cold thin bedroom

Fighting underwear

Over skin

Under where?

Shirt buttons

Not in right holes

No time to do it all again

Tie tied too tight

Uneven

Too thin

Back to front

Octopus jumper

Head in armhole

Blindfolded to

Which way round

The front goes

Tied up like spaghetti

Feet in wrong shoes

On wrong feet

Slippery snake laces

Forever untied

Making the trip

Unpleasant

Satchel on shoulder

Not very nice

Lipstick on cheek

Despite being wiped

Mum brushed hair

Crooked parting

Waved bye bye

At the end of the gate

Dearly departed

The walk of shame

To the school gates

Playground laughter

Pointing fingers

"It's inside out"

Giggled behind hands

In his direction

Sly glances

Red faced

Head down

Hands in pockets

Kicking stones about

Knees together

He's inside out.

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